29th July.
Today was, just nice. Yup, that would be the word. When everything seems to fail you, pray to God. And I'm sure He helped me through today and clearly, everything went perfectly well. ;)
I donated blood today!!! Isn't that awesome? No, I don't mean to say I'm awesome but I don't mind though if you think I am. ;P But yeah, this would be my third time donating blood and luckily this time, though from the nurses' expressions, I could tell that they found it pretty confusing to locate my vein/artery, I didn't have to be injected several times just to get through my really shy vein. I think it should be an artery shouldn't it? It was my left hand that I used, so shouldn't that be an artery instead? Biology, ahem. ;P
I lied, again. I didn't mean to! ;P So basically, this was like the second time I lied about my previous meals just to be able to pass this 'test' for blood donation. Alright fine, I'll try my best to make sure I won't repeat this the next time. I'll TRY. ;)
Well, the second time when I donated blood, it was pretty, um, memorable to me now. Oh yeah, that memory will always stay with me now. Not merely because of the more-than-once injection but of the really sweet and caring treatment from you that day. Believe it or not, I guess I could still remember that one message with that sad face from you about my arm on the night I donated blood. Perhaps I'm just stupid enough to even make space for such trivial stuff. But I do.
I managed to take a picture of my awesome packet of blood! Um, well, it was after that only did I realize that there is no USB cable for Nokia phone and for some freaking reason that I do not know of, I can't transfer the picture through bluetooth. Oh well, should be thankful I've got a phone to use now right? Sorry. ;P
Met with mum at Maybank today, so much stuff, then went off to Taylor's, settled almost everything. Remember when I said when everything seems to fail you, just pray? I think that was it. I was so sure I could get it all done today but then at the eleventh hour, I realized that I did not have a spare copy of my sem 3's results and jeez, that feeling was just devastating. Imagine I came all the way just to get this done and suddenly this happened. But thank God, the original transcript was out already and at the end of the day, everything went well. Really well. =)
So it's 29th today. Another 29th, another month. Last month, at least I saw your status about it. But today, there's none. You know, I can't help but feel a little disappointed and maybe a little hurt. I think disappointment is slightly more than the latter but yeah. When I saw what you wrote on the last 29th, it felt different. Like, you still cared and you were hurt too of what had happened then. But now, I can't see that in you anymore. It's like the flicker of fire has just burnt out, leaving only a trail of smoke, a rejected hope.
Then suddenly, I had this crazy but super awesome idea. I can be so awesome sometimes that I even surprise myself. ;P Gee, I should probably substitute that awesome word with another awesomer one. ;P And that awesome idea is to have a piece of cake on the 29th of every month. Well man, I should have thought of that last month! But I guess it's not too late to start something new right? ;)
I think I suggested this too on the 29th of earlier months when, well, you know. And now, I';; revive this abandoned custom. I might just make it into one of my usual habit and then it'll be my tradition! How cool does that sound?? ;DDD I guess since I'm the only one so determined on holding on and promising myself that that it will be worth it, even if it might turn out otherwise, I shall make it a point to do so in the coming days of the 29th of each month. It may not work out but what if it does? What if I just, somehow, get used to this whole idea and maybe this will be the reason that brings me through and perhaps, just perhaps, for things to work out for us as well? Who knows right? A girl like me, just cannot afford to lose any hope in whatever that she's doing. I just can't and don't and won't. Maybe it's just meant to be, you know.
Just minutes ago, it struck me, that maybe I was never meant to just 'settle down', you know. I'm not talking about the marriage kind of settling down or what but the kind where I'm always on the move. You see, since young, I've never had a fixed condition or place. Things change so fast sometimes that I could be swept off my feet. Of course, I would not regret it for I don't think regretting it makes my life any better than it is now. I never had a really fixed schooling. So if you tell me how it feels like to have a gathering with all your primary friends or secondary friends that you have been with for the last five or ten years, I simply could not truly understand how it actually feels like. Why am I even talking about this? I think the point is that, it just struck me that maybe I'm one of those people who just seem to be roaming this planet and no matter how much the need or yearning to finally settle down, it could never be satisfied. I don't know if there's even such a thing but somehow, it seems, like the most fitting explanation I could convince myself now. Perhaps you don't see the connection between this and what I'm feeling now but I guess it sort of makes sense to me, for now. Quirky, ain't I? That would be cool too! I could follow the footsteps of Johnny Depp! ;D
American Chocolate. I even thought of treating myself to Secret Recipe but nahhh, I've been using too much money lately. This will do. ;) This, will be the first cake in collaboration of this 29th. For now, it'll be only me. I've watched movies, where people do silly stuff when they wait for love. I guess I am too. Love letters, paper crates, cards, flowers and all sorts. Mine will be cakes. I like cakes anyway but then, I'll be fat. I once told myself that someday, I would want to randomly buy a 1kg cake just to eat it for the entire week. So I do weird stuff, at least that's what my heart wants. Definitely not what my brain would encourage since I'm always the one grunting about my weight and how I go about looking myself in the mirror and telling myself I'm fat and that I've gotta lose weight and all. Okay, screw those all for just this one day of the whole freaking month alright? *pinky promise* I love pinky promises, we enjoyed that, once. In short, this is what I will do. A piece of cake for the 29th of every month. For the time being, I shall do it on my own first. Maybe I'm just hoping that this sweetness and fond memory will lead the way for you. This is how I'll wait. =)
Supposedly the 11th month.
PS. Good news: My phone has been fixed! I'll collect it tomorrow and hopefully, *fingers crossed* everything's alright and nothing's lost. Thank God. =)
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